A little bit of History, Heart, and Hope (Emily & Kyle)

Emily & Kyle Cazzetta

April 15, 2023

Father of the bride toast

G. Page Singletary

Good evening. What a joy, as father-of-the-bride, to toast Emily and Kyle as a newly married couple. Before I begin, please bow your heads for a blessing.

Dear God . . .

This is a fantastic day, and with great joy, I ask your blessing on the marriage of Emily and Kyle Cazzetta. I give thanks to all here tonight to celebrate with Emily and Kyle. Your love and support are so evident, so abundant.

In our thoughts are those who can't be here in person but are here in spirit and live in our hearts. Parents, Grandparents, other close of kin, and friends. We are thinking of you.

May our time together tonight be full of love, laughter, and good cheer. Bless this meal . . . and thanks to all who have prepared and made today possible.

In Christ's name, I pray, 

AMEN

Kyle told me anyone was allowed to speak at his wedding, but they could not use notes. I thought about trying that, but I really want to get this right, thus a few notecards in my hand. He did not say anything about 'props' – so Kyle, I need you to hold this giant industrial-size spoon, and Emily, I need you to hold this big spatula. And I want to put on this special Ted Lasso 'I believe' baseball cap . . . because 'I believe' in the two of you, and 'I believe' this is going to be an amazing evening.

Cathy and I want to welcome everyone to Austin. Thank you for being here. There are too many people to mention who have helped make today possible, but I want to thank the administrators and staff of Austin Country Club, who have been wonderful to work with in planning and executing our event.

To Kyle's family: Roseann, Vinnie, Collin, and Maggie. Cathy and I have loved getting to know you. We are so grateful for how each of you embraces and loves Emily. You make up a beautiful family, and you have an amazing extended family, and I know Emily is super happy to be joining in the fun. 

And Roseann and Vinnie, thanks for your generosity in helping put on this weekend. Thanks for being such great team players and being what we like to call 'doers!' We like doers in our family, and you guys know how to get things done. And you do it with grace and kindness.

Emily and Kyle . . . 

Our good friend Scott Ritchie took home the hat!

My thoughts tonight will be framed by three words that start with the letter 'h'. . . A little bit of history, a little bit of heart, and a little bit of hope.

This framework was suggested by some very special cousins, Molly and Chris Oakey. Molly and Chris live off the grid on a sustainable farm. It's called Mulberry Hill Farm. The first non-relative who can show me where Mulberry Hill Farm is on a Google map can leave tonight with this Ted Lasso 'I believe' baseball cap.

A little bit of history

Emily Page Singletary, or 'eBug,' was born on the 13th of May, 1994, in Nashville, TN. She is the second of our three daughters and our middle child. Cathy is the middle child in her family, and for good reasons, we sometimes call Emily 'little Cathy.' 

They are both quite funny and just a lot of fun to be around. They both can be quite mischievous. They are fabulous organizers and party throwers. They can fix or make just about anything! And they look alike. Sometimes, when we go through family photos together, and Kyle sees a picture of Cathy from when I first met her nearly 40 years ago, he does a big double take and says, "Whoa, that's my fiancée." Now your wife!

Kyle Joseph Cazzetta, whose first nickname, I learned, was 'Covers,' landed on our planet one year and one day ahead of Emily, so the 12th of May, 1993, in Warwick, NY. Kyle is the first of three children for Roseanne and Vinnie.

Middle children, like Emily, are known to be problem solvers and fixers, get along well with others, and smooth things out when the going gets tough kind of people. 

First children, like Kyle, are likely to be type A, driven personalities, who often speak their minds, and even enjoy poking the pig, as we might say here in Texas. I asked some of my Austin friends what you call someone who has a knack for telling it like it is, and one of my best buddies noted that he calls his wife the human spoon, as she has an excellent ability for stirring things up. I thought that was spot on since Kyle loves to cook.

So, Kyle, if you are indeed a human spoon, the good news is your Emily might just be the world's greatest spatula, as she has a wonderful knack for smoothing things out.

Perhaps that is one of the reasons why these two have gotten along so well from the moment they first met on a blind date on their birthday weekend nearly six years ago. A blind date was arranged by their mutual friend groups, who had a hunch they might be a good match. Kyle, some of your buddies told me last night that when they first met and got to know Emily, they simply told you, "Don't screw this up, Kyle!"

By the way, Kyle, your dad told me your first nickname was 'Covers.' When you were a toddler and ended up in your parent's bed, you would completely hog the covers. When I first heard this, I thought it was related to your sports gambling, but it turned out otherwise.

Vinnie also told me Kyle was the last person in his grade to have a cell phone...' why do I need a cell phone when I can use the other kids' phones to call you.' Classic Kyle speak there. Did I mention stubbornness as another attribute of first children?

And speaking of stubbornness, when Emily was small, we remember she did not like to wear socks, especially if they did not fit perfectly. Whenever someone in our family does not want to do something, we have a mantra inspired by young Emily, who would often mock her parents: 'Put your shoes and socks on, put your shoes and socks on.'

Emily, who was often simply barefooted because it was not worth the hassle, was a bit of a Tom Boy. Even though she loved the fashion industry, she only wore Umbro soccer shorts and tee shirts most of her youth. Her love of fashion was always more on the 'how do you make stuff side'. . . which she got from Cathy's mom, BeBe, who taught her how to sew.

In middle school, our sporty Tom Boy played many sports. We have fond memories of the year she played on the school basketball team, ran cross country, threw the discus and the shot, played soccer in goal and in the field, and made time for some golf. She eventually settled into golf as her primary sport, giving her a chance to pursue her love of the apparel business at Savannah College of Art & Design.

And while Emily was learning about fabrics, zippers, and buttons at SCAD and working hard on her golf game, Kyle was up north at Yale, kicking field goals and punts, studying Economics, and locking in on a particular friend group. I heard a saying this weekend from one of Kyle's teammate's fathers. When you decide to play collegiate football at a school like Yale, it is not a four-year decision but rather a 40-year decision. And this wedding is a testament to how true that is.

As anyone knows who has ever tried to balance university life with athletics, it takes work. By all accounts, Emily and Kyle were very alike in how they handled playing a varsity sport. They were good teammates, fun to be around, and encouraging to others. And most importantly, they both had the stick-to-it-ness needed to persevere, a quality that will continue to be important in their married life.

Emily had a strength and conditioning coach at SCAD, whom I thought a lot of, and so did Emily. His name was Coach Carter, and he spent time with the golf team nearly every morning in the gym. When we would go to tournaments, I always enjoyed walking with Coach Carter. He was an ex-Marine with a shaved head and a beautiful, fit, and inspiring character. Coach Carter once told me, "Page, when these girls get out of college, they kick ass." He knew they were special, and they were learning to handle things many college kids simply never understand.

A little bit of Heart

We sometimes lovingly and affectionately call Kyle our 'wild-ass Yankee.' We do so in contrast to our other son-in-law, Taylor. Taylor is from Atlanta and met Sally at the University of Georgia and is the quintessential Southern Gentleman. Even though they are pretty different, they have developed a special bond, as demonstrated by Kyle asking Taylor to officiate the wedding. If variety is the spice of life, we have variety with these two young men, and we are most grateful for that.

While at Yale, Kyle spoke to his father daily during football season. Not because he was homesick or about where he stood on the depth chart, but just a play-by-play about his day. I now appreciate how Kyle makes time to check on me and everyone in Emily's family and even reaches out to our friend groups to let people know he cares.

When living in NYC with Adam, Bill, and Jeff, Kyle created a ritual of roommate dinner each Sunday evening. The ground rules were that Kyle would cook, his roommates would be on time and present for dinner, and they had to clean the dishes.

Emily has this same way about her. Emily was always close to Sally as a child, as they were only two years apart. But when Lucy came along, six years her younger, Emily was great about including Lucy in everything we did as a family and many of the things she did with her friends. And now, with Cathy and I living abroad, the three girls have rallied together to plan this wedding, and it makes us very happy to see how well they work together and how close they are.

Emily is a connector, constantly aware of what others need, and looks to help others. When she finished her college golf career, she got a letter from her coach . . . I want to share the last paragraph:

“In all my years, you will go down as one of the best captains and players I have ever had the honor of working with. To watch you grow as a lady and as a player has been such a joy. It was so fun to work with you this year and you saved me in so many ways. Thank you for everything. I will miss you dearly. Please stay in touch.” – Coach Workman.

I can't talk about heart without adding a bit more about sports. Kyle's life took an interesting turn when his father purchased a little wooden kicking block from the local sporting goods store to see if his soon-to-be 10th-grade soccer player could kick a different ball through a goalpost. Think about how that day changed the trajectory of Kyle's life.

Kyle doing his thing w/ Gen. Stanley McChrystal

Emily and I learned the game of golf together right here at Austin Country Club. We were lucky to land in such a special place and grateful to several golf professionals, especially our long-time Head Pro and Director of golf, Dale Morgan, Head Teaching Professional Ann Marie Gildersleeve, and Lonnie Alexander, Head Pro out at Onion Creek. I always told my kids that whenever they come through the gates to this place, they must realize this is a privilege; in fact, it should feel like the joy and excitement of Christmas morning. Emily always honored that when she came here to practice or to eat chicken nuggets with her buddies in the kids' grill room.

A little bit of Hope

In closing, I offer up a little bit of hope through a short poem I wrote titled . . . I believe.

I believe

that our middle child

Emily Page

Is an amazing

beautiful bride

She takes life

in stride

With brown eyes wide

A friend,

a steady guide,

You want her,

by your side

I believe

That a certain

Wild ass Yankee

Was meant to be

The one

He too

is a lot of fun

And now

it is done

We have

another son

How did our spatula

Our middle child

Our easy going

Garment sewing

Fairway splitter

Meet this critter?

This human spoon

A handsome groom

A left-footed

field goal kicker

In a flicker

He knew

On a blind date

He had found

his soul mate

And now

They continue

In a married state

Where sometimes

The putts will drop

The kicks are true

and the skies

are blue

And other times

Putts will rattle out

Kicks will sail about

Life will twist

Life will turn

You might call it

the churn

Take dead aim

A wise man

once proclaimed

Because honestly

Just like a golf shot

Struck on the sweet spot

Or a field goal try

Flying through the sky

A marriage is . . .

What you choose it to be

When a union is right

The future is bright

This bride, this groom

Joy fills this room

And we hope

that in all they do

They will remember

You, and you, and you

Because we are here

Amongst good cheer

Tequila and Texas beer

To wish Emily and Kyle

the happiest

year after year after year!

Amazing group of young women and men. Thanks to all for making April 15, 2023, a day to remember!