A letter from a loving father to his third born daughter at LLYC (Echo Valley!)
My dearest daughter Lucy,
It is my custom to start this annual letter with the same opening paragraphs, and I see no reason to start this one any other way. This is the eighth consecutive summer that we have had at least one daughter at Laity Lodge Youth Camp. We always look forward to making the beautiful drive into the Hill Country in early June, stopping in Fredericksburg for lunch, continuing out towards Leaky and eventually down the Foundation Camp dirt road into the Frio Canyon River Bed. “Yes you drive in the river,” says the sign!
It is my wish that you are reading this letter all alone in a quiet and beautiful place. Please don’t continue until you find a quiet place where you are all alone. I hope these words will be meaningful to you. I am attempting to share some thoughts I believe will serve you well as you enter this next year of your life. It is always a time of reflection and prayer when I write this letter. We are so blessed to have each other and to have such a special and loving extended family.
Before continuing will you do me a favor? I want you to look around and breathe deeply and notice the beauty of the earth. Notice the big things and the small things. Notice the sky and the ground. Look as far as your eyes can see, and say to yourself, “I want to make my world a big and beautiful world.” It is your choice to always make your world big and inclusive, not small and petty.
Now look down at the ground, and look for something very small (like an ant or a twig) and pray that God will help you always notice and celebrate the little things in life, for those things are also very important and impactful. Close your eyes and imagine your father, your mother, and your sisters - all praying for you to have another truly remarkable experience at Laity Lodge. Please take a few minutes to do this before continuing.
Lucy, let’s go back in time 12 plus years. Here is how it all started, copied from a document we wrote before your birthday a few years back - the one where we had dinner at California Pizza Kitchen and then you went to the Taylor Swift Concert with your mom, Grace, and Ms. Carpenter.
On March 13, 2000 Baby Lucy came into the world at 9AM with an operating room full of specialists and surgeons prepared to rush her to surgery. After a series of tests that lasted all morning, the doctors announced that Lucy was perfectly healthy!Lucy, your sixth grade school year has been another time of remarkable growth. Your mom and I are so proud of you. You made one of the all-time smoothest transitions to middle school that any kid has ever made. It was such a joy to watch you learn each day and to watch how well you adapted socially. Just like your big sisters, you ‘stay within yourself’ and you stay true to yourself in a very age appropriate way. I pray that you will be able to continue to do so, as each year there will be more peer pressure to move faster and to experience new things - some of which are not healthy choices. Uncle Ricky always says, “Let the game come to you” and this is such a great phrase for growing up in our fast-moving world and community. I know you understand this.
What a glorious day. We named her after her maternal great, great grandmother Lucelia VanPatton and in honor of our long friendship with our dear friend Ricky May and his parents. At the time, Ricky’s father, Grandpa May, was gravely ill, though he recovered. A couple of years later, we were all saddened by the loss of Ricky’s mom after a battle with cancer. There is no doubt in our minds that a little bit of Louise May lives on in the young life and spirit of Lucelia May Singletary. In fact, Ms. May made that very clear upon the naming of Lucy—when she stated that it would be necessary for Lucy to be smart, pretty, and witty if we were to use the family name! I am pleased to report that she is hitting on all cylinders.
I have been thinking how cool it was that you started every morning this year at Cedar Creek Elementary School, saying hello to your 5th grade teachers and then walking with your friends to Hill Country. That was such a symbolic way to ‘stay age appropriate’ - paying tribute to your past and to the teachers who helped prepare you for middle school. I hope you continue doing that next year and the next? Then, when you go to high school, you will have a nice little morning run from Hill Country Middle School to Westlake High School! (Just kidding.)
Lucy, I can tell a lot about how well-adjusted you are by the friends you keep. That was fun for me last week when we went to Howdy Donuts with your buddies. I thought our conversation was really special about ‘self-branding’ and asking each girl to describe themselves in one sentence or less. I was very impressed with the thoughtful descriptions your friends and you gave of yourselves. Each of you stressed an appreciation for being unique and passionate about something. Each of you had an element of keeping your bodies healthy from a physical standpoint. Each of you showed a willingness to learn and grow your talents. And there was also a strong spiritual component to each girls’ self-description.
You know I love Stephen Covey’s quote: “I will tap my talents and fuel my passions in a way that rises out of a great need in the world that I am drawn to by conscience to meet, for therein lies my voice, my true-calling, my soul’s code.” Notice how the bold words in Covey’s quote contrast to the paragraph above. Life is a journey of ups and downs, and we are not always hitting on all cylinders, but it helps to understand these different capacities and to always remember the importance of balancing our time mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.
Covey says this about the above. “When you study the lives of all great achievers--those who have had the greatest influence on others, those who have made things happen--you will find a pattern. Through their persistent efforts and inner struggle, they have greatly expanded their four native human intelligences or capacities. The highest manifestations of these four intelligences are: for mental, vision; for the physical, discipline; for the emotional, passion; for the spiritual, conscience. These manifestations also represent our highest means of expressing our voice.”
Yes Lucy, it is important and good to stretch and challenge yourself in each of these areas. I know you did this during this past year. For example, you made such amazing progress with your dance. I know that you did not accomplish one of your main goals and that it was disappointing not to make ADE. But you can use that experience as motivation and encouragement to move forward, to redirect and re-energize towards new goals and new challenges. We were all so impressed with your beautiful dancing. Sally could not believe how advanced those dances were and how strong of a dancer you have become!
I always take the time in this letter to let you know how much I love your mom. I want you to know that I think your mom is the most amazing woman on the planet. I love her dearly and it is my deepest wish that all three of my daughters will one day find a man who loves them as much as I love your mom. She does so much to try and make your world, and that of your sisters, a good and safe world to grow up in, so please remember to show your appreciation and love to your mom.
It has been a wonderful year for your sisters as well. Sally is doing great at UGA and has found a field of study that she loves. Her internship in New York is going well and we are proud of her for putting herself out there each and every day. Emily’s graduation season was a time of great celebration, as we prepare to launch her off to SCAD. She is also a remarkable young woman with so much to offer the world. She has so much talent in the design field and she is a fabulous golfer. It will be fun to continue to cheer Sally and Emily towards their dreams.
As I do each year while you are at Laity Lodge, I am going to pray that God will speak to your heart. Your experiences shape and mold you into the person you are meant to become, especially when you slow down and listen to your heart and hear the voice of God. I will also pray that you will see God’s wonderful ways through getting to know others at Laity Lodge and that your new friends (both full-time and part-time) will share experiences with you that you will always treasure.
Your mother and I are looking forward to the next six years with you Lucy. You are truly a wonderful daughter and I hope you know that we are always here for you.
As I close this letter let me offer some Bible verses for you to ponder in your quiet place. First from 1st Peter 3: 3-4. This reminds me of why I think you are so special. You might want to read this one aloud to yourself and really let the meaning fill your soul.
“Your beauty . . . should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”Remember, quietness is a profoundly creative element. When we have noise around us all of the time and when we live life in too hectic and frantic of a manner, we end up confused. We end up with noise on the inside and we lose our bearings and our confidence. Then we lose our strength. Remember, Jesus said, “I will make you strong if you quietly trust me.”
May God bless you always and thanks for being my daughter,
Dad
